[chronicles] Papa Was A Rolling Stone

[redroanchronicles]

My dog Trudeau is a mystery. He is a mystery wrapped in an enigma that sort of walks in a circle around a riddle. He bays like a bloodhound, and his color is a little shepherd-y, and his white paws are rather dapper-looking but not particularly helpful in identifying his breed. Taking a walk with him is like taking a game show on the road: random passersby engage in self-styled trivia quizzes to try to discover his heritage. Simply being in Trudeau's presence turns everyone in the world into a dog expert, and they will not only guess what breeds compose his background, but they will tell you, quite emphatically.

malnpudl, drunk with the power of modern science, dropped by my vet's office awhile back and pre-paid for me to have the mutt genetically tested. Yes, that's right. You can DNA test your dog to find out WTF sort of genetic material spawned the mutant beast, and if you're anything like me, you can even have a roommate crazy enough to pony up the cash for it.

Unfortunately, if your dog's heritage is too heavy on mixed breeds -- mutts for generations back -- there isn't much a DNA test will tell you. And even then it's not 100% reliable. My vet had warned me, before we did the test, that the results she'd seen from it to date weren't terribly enlightening. But it wasn't my dime, and apparently Mal had a burning need to know, so I went ahead with the test regardless, and after waiting and waiting very patiently for results that, as it turned out, were mailed directly to my vet and not to me, today I managed to access the company's online system to review Trudeau's test results.

Prepare to have your minds blown, my friends.

Trudeau's lineage is muttly enough that there are no breeds listed as "significant," which means that neither of his parents were purebreds. There are also none listed as "minor" genetic contributors, which would be breeds that had contributed at least 12.5% of the beast's genetic material.

However. There are two breeds listed as "intermediate" breeds, meaning that at least 25% of Trudeau's genetic makeup comes from these breeds, "so you may see some physical and behavioral traits represented in your dog." So what, you may wonder, are his "intermediate" breeds? My bet was on bloodhound and some kind of shepherd dog. My vet was sure it was bloodhound and Anatolian shepherd. The shelter had him listed as a Great Dane cross. But actually, the only two breeds that appear at all in his genetic profile are:

Alaskan Malamute

and......

Basset hound.

Thank you, science. You've just completely blown my mind. I might need to go curl up in a fetal position while all of my ideas about the universe rearrange themselves in my brain.

Comments

[malnpudl]

I think the test results are bogus.

I don't regret having done it; a failed experiment is, scientifically speaking, as meaningful as a successful one. And finding out whether this test works and is worth the money (no and no, IMO) is worthwhile because now I won't recommend it to anyone else.

But as far as I'm concerned: NO. Tru shows absolutely zero indication of any northern/spitz traits. And those long legs... just... no.

Ah, well. So it goes.

I shall henceforth and always consider him a German shepherd/bloodhound mix, possibly with some other bits here and there. And since (as far as I'm concerned) there's nothing to contradict me, I can happily wallow in my own opinions. *g*

[redroanchronicles]

Hah, we probably should've just saved your money and done more Internet research; I happened across this in-depth analysis of the MARS test on a Yorkie forum:

One dog that I owned I had tested twice. The dog was some sort of a dalmation/australian shepherd mix. The first test came back as 75% dalmation, and 25% unknown. Six months later the dog tested as 35% labrador, 15% dalmation, and 50% Husky. Tests are completely bogus.

Perhaps they just insert a northern breed at random? And pull their other results out of a hat? :D Although that forum is also this huge clusterfuck of dog-breed politics so I have no idea what's genuine analysis and what's clusterfuckitude.

I actually could see the basset hound part, though. Provided there's also like... great dane or something in there to make him HUGE-SIZED.

[malnpudl]

The other thing is that those two breeds are, respectively, challenging to train and really hard to train. Tru is easy -- eager to please, delighted to play the game, and a fast and happy learner. I see a herding breed in that, and his coat, tail, and ear set practically shout GSD (IMO). So I'm happy with my extremely opinionated bias assessment. ;-)